Edging and orgasm control

What does edging mean?

Edging when in sex, means teasing and then stopping stimulation just before you come, waiting for around 30 seconds, and keep repeating until you finally let go to the end and orgasm. Edging is the practice of stopping yourself from reaching a sexual climax when you are right on the edge of an orgasm and are about to explode. It is also known as surfing, peaking, and teasing. This art of practice has become quite a trend in sexual health, as it’s known to help achieve a better orgasm. It was introduced as the “stop-start method” to help people last longer before reaching orgasm. Edging can make you more keenly aware of your sexual responses, both solo and with a partner.

Orgasms, and what you need to know before you start edging

Experimentation is essential to maintain a healthy sex life, and having a much better awareness of your body and how it responds sexually can reduce anxiety within your sex life.
When it comes to edging, you get to learn the stages of arousal that lead up to an orgasm.

There are 4 stages of arousal altogether.

Excitement: You start to get hot, muscles tense up. the heart starts to race, breathing gets heavier, and blood flows quickly to the penis, vagina, and clitoris. The vagina gets wet, and the scrotum tightens and clenches.

Plateau: Everything that you are experiencing in the excitement stage is getting more and more intense, and closer to an orgasm. This is where you should get ready to stop and slow the pace right down.

Orgasm: In an orgasm, there are a series of nerve responses and muscle tension that occurs, which results in a feeling of complete ecstasy, lubrication of the vagina, and ejaculation of the penis. But when you are practicing edging, this is what you need to hold off from, until you are ready.

Resolution: After an orgasm, the tissue goes back to normal size and color. This is also when the “refractory period” starts. This is a short space of time where you can’t become aroused again. It has been known to last up to 3 days.

These 4 stages work differently for everyone, as people tend to feel things in their way during sexual play. It’s good for you to practice different techniques and get to know your body, which can affect your satisfaction, sexual responses and build a stronger bond with your partner.

The “stop-start method” of edging

Lock the doors, turn down the lights, and maybe put some music on.
2: Get in the mood by touching yourself until your penis gets hard or your vagina gets wet.
3: You start masturbating, stroke your penis, stimulate your clitoris, or do whatever that makes you come normally.
4: When you think you are about to come, stop! Slow it down or take your hands away.
5: Go back to focusing on what got you excited at the start.
6: Start touching yourself again but masturbate slightly faster building up the speed. Do this until you are ready to orgasm.
7: Let it go! Allow yourself to reach orgasm. It will probably be more intense, and last longer due to the edging.

With a partner:
1: You start to get aroused with your partner with foreplay activities. Try oral play, licking sucking, playing with nipples, or whatever gets you there.
2: Be vocal, dirty talk, say what gets you there, and give instructions to each other.
3: Reduce the speed or stop.
4: Start the stimulation process again, keep stopping and starting until enough is enough, until you can’t take it anymore, and then you are finally ready to come.

What are the benefits of edging? Edging can have a few benefits improving masturbation and sex. If you have not spent much time getting to know your body, you won’t know what makes you feel good and what arouses you, which ends up in unfulfilling results in a sexual relationship. Learning about yourself by edging actually can give you information about your body, which then builds up confidence in yourself. This helps you become more open sexually, resulting in being able to communicate with your partner and have an awesome sex life.

How to know when to stop edging and come:
If you are edging solo then feel free to come when you are ready! If it’s with a partner then make sure you communicate with each other and listen to each other. Both are key. When edging you may experience close to orgasm, something that’s known as a half orgasm, or disappearing orgasm. When this happens you won’t feel the full effects of an orgasm or the vaginal contractions. Timing stimulation and full body experience that comes with orgasm will be challenging, but don’t get frustrated, as you will get there! Practice makes perfect. Learning how to control when you want to orgasm just adds to the fun of the experience.

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